Lazy people of the world, unite. Do you often refuse to eat meals because you don’t want to cook? How about skimping on personal hygiene?
Do you ask friends or family to do exceedingly simple tasks so you don’t have to get off of the couch? Ever come up with an elaborate technique to make your life even more lazy-enabled?
Hey, I once hid dirty dishes in the oven so I wouldn’t have to wash them. If you can’t see it, it’s not there!
On Reddit, unashamedly lazy people are sharing the laziest things they have every done. And honestly, a lot of this behavior sounds like depression to me, but who am I to judge?
1.
“Didn’t want to make lunch, so I just…didn’t eat.” — Daft-CJ
2.
“I once put instructions to go to the right side of the house and deliver a pizza to the first window (my bedroom). I didn’t feel like walking to the front of the house to get my pizza. Driver obliged, and got a very nice tip.” — stickyWithWhiskey
3.
“I was in a bar once and was too lazy to leave and go across the street to pick up food for dinner so I had them deliver it to me on the second barstool from the left.” — childlikeempress16
4.
“When i was about 7 or 8, I had a small piece of paper (think it was a candy wrapper) which I had to discard. I was too lazy to walk to the kitchen to throw it into the bin so I ate it.” — frownface84
5.
“Waiting six months instead of changing the clocks for daylight savings.” — OffshoreTaxWankersFC
6.
“When I was a teenager and on summer break I once spent 3 days on a lazy boy in my living room watching TV. I’m more comfortable not wearing pants but people kept coming and going so I pretended to wear shorts for 3 days by just laying them over my legs. My parents were concerned to say the least.” — ArtemisIsFoul
7.
“Going to sleep early instead of cooking myself dinner.” — babyishAuri
8.
“My dad was infamous for this but I learned a lot of Latino dads did this. I would be in my room and he would call for me like if he’s getting attacked. When I meet him in the living room, he would ask me to hand him the remote…that’s on the same couch…a little more than arm’s reach.” — YellowStar012
9.
“I never like to go to bed without brushing and flossing my teeth. However, I despise the actual process of brushing and flossing even though it takes all of a few minutes. And so the number of times in the past that I’ve stayed up several hours later than I meant to just because I didn’t feel like taking a few minutes to brush and floss is just sad. (I don’t really do this so much anymore though. I still hate it but I just kinda just grit my teeth and go for it so I can go to bed when I actually mean to, lol.)” — lostmyaccountsoyeah
10.
“When I was younger I was a real brat (15ish) and asked my mum to bring me crackers. Clearly I was too lazy to get off my arse and get it myself. A few minutes later I tried to shut my door but couldn’t reach it with my hands so I kicked it with my feet. Unbeknownst to me my mum was waking in with the crackers at that exact moment and slammed the door into her and the crackers. God I’m an awful person.” — dafaqisgoingondud
“I delayed my university convocation by six months because I was too lazy to send an email confirming my attendance. My laptop was even in the same room as me, I just couldn’t reach it from my bed.” — questionable_post
12.
“My wife once asked me to come do something. I said I can’t. She asked why not. I said “I’m sittin…” — Daerys82
13.
“Perhaps my most ‘lazy’ experience was when I first met my fiancé. Context is complicated, but we moved in to her place together a few days after meeting (all is not what it seems, don’t judge). We lived quite literally 20 yards from a Taco Bell, but on my days off I was so drained I couldn’t drag myself out of bed, and so we used an early Door Dash-like service that had been growing in our area (before those services were mainstream). They charged exuberant delivery charges, but we’d be damned to turn of That 70s Show, put shoes on, and walk down the road. One time a college girl just walked her stoned ass over with our delivery because she was on break and eating at the Taco Bell when she got the ticket. She ended up staying over to watch the NBA Finals. She was really nice. My fiancé and I still hang out with her when she’s in town.” — anhedoniaman
14.
“Used to have one of those ‘clap on, clap off’ lights in my room. I hated clapping so I just made an audio recording of me clapping and mapped it to one of the programmable keys on my keyboard.” — zarina112
15.
“Made and ate ramen in a coffee pot so I didn’t have to wash a bowl.” — phil_mccrotch
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