If you ask us what we’re thinking about on any given Tuesday, the answer will always be the same: Rihanna’s Swarovski crystal dress. But what if you ask “what do women think about during sex?” The answer…actually might be the same.
When you’re having sex, your mind can leave the moment and go wandering to all different places. We did the research (by which we mean we asked r/Women) to find out what women are thinking about when things are hot and heavy.
What Do Women Actually Think About During Sex?
1. This is our favorite type of yoga practice.
“I wonder how long I can stay like this. I’m surprised my back is so flexible.” — u/lexish
2. Cervical injuries are not a turn-on, dude.
“I told him ‘more shallow’ and he’s still finger banging my cervix. Am I an idiot? Is he really this stupid?” — u/searedscallops
3. Disney Sing-a-long VHS tapes turn partnered sex into a duet.
“The other day, The Lion King was on the TV in the background and I almost burst out into song. ‘OH I JUST CAN’T WAIT TO BE KING.’” — u/inhale-exhale
4. Insecurities, begone!
“I’d say about 95% of my thoughts are about how great it feels, how attractive my partner is, and hoping I’m pleasing him and he’s enjoying himself.
The other 5% would probably be insecurities and little things, like ‘Oh my god I didn’t shower after the gym I probably smell awful.’ ‘I really hope he’s not thinking of that girl I saw him eyeing at dinner.’ Or ‘My jaw is sore from this blow job. I hope he doesn’t mind if I switch to PIV already.’ — u/irish-ygritte
5. We’re craving sausage. Literally.
“When I am deeply experiencing and enjoying the moment, I subconsciously see my childhood grocery store, very vividly. Usually the meat and dairy section. Is this weird? Is there some deep psychological reason for this? Whatever, I love sex.” — u/GezzySinger
6. For 20 minutes, the voices in my head are quiet.
“For the most part, sex is the only time my mind is quiet. It’s very relaxing for me mentally. I don’t really think about anything in words, just sensations and emotions.” — u/foxlizard
7. Curse those giant water canteens!
“Gotta pee. Gotta pee. Gotta pee.” — u/lemuffins
8. Save some room for dessert.
“I know it’s weird, but I tend to think about sweets, like waffles with strawberries and whipped cream with strawberry syrup. Or fresh doughnuts. Or chocolate. After sex, I usually do end up eating something sweet.” — u/RedWomanZ
9. Is this that mind-body meditation everyone’s talking about?
“Usually I’m not thinking at all. It is one of the only times I am just being.” u/fnredditacct
10. Time to paint with all the colors of the wind.
“The best times are when I think about colors or music lyrics. It really helps to have sex in the dark because I can relax into it without being distracted by the things around me.” — u/naanbud
11. We get it.
“Sometimes my depression and/or anxiety are bad and I find it hard to focus because my mind keeps drifting to stressful things.” — u/celestialism
12. If you poke the bull, you get the horny bull.
“How to edge him enough that he takes control because he can’t stand it anymore!” — u/fourty-tw0
13. Hold it…HOLD IT…
“Don’t fart don’t fart don’t fart oh that’s nice don’t fart yes yes don’t fart.” — u/spacemonkymafia
14. Who needs magic mushrooms when you have great sex?
“During sex I’ll often have what I can only describe as visualizations. Just odd, random, often surreal or abstract, images that pop into my head while in the throes of passion.
Sometimes it’ll be something like ‘red square on a trippy purple background’ or ‘scary dog face surrounded by floating cookies.’ Just strange stuff, very fleeting. I usually don’t even remember it afterward, so I had never talked about it with anyone.” — u/Salsa__Stark
15. If only sex could help us remember all our passwords.
“As an ADHD person, it can vary from the history of beekeeping to my pension plan.” — u/Shorse_rider
16. To be fair, things were very slippery at the time.
“Please don’t accidentally put it in my butthole again.” — u/mynameis_reek
17. Head empty, no sex thoughts.
“People think when having sex…?” — u/Ryinne
In her free time, she enjoys volunteering for reproductive justice causes, dropping that she worked at Walt Disney World into every conversation, and using her Wedding and Events Planner certification to throw Survivor watch parties. See more of her work on her website or follow her on Twitter @maddihiggs.
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