From the M&Ms getting an unnecessary revamp to Wordle becoming the next stage of the pandemic, it’s been a curious week for funny tweets. Everyone seems to be feeling a little burnt out, but hopefully these raise your spirits a little. If not, might we suggest a Ouija board?
We’ll cool it with the corny jokes for now, but check out these funny tweets.
The Funniest Tweets This Week
1. The CDC says it’s ok to go to work if you’ve been bitten by a zombie.
https://twitter.com/HeroesInColor00/status/1481606258029477894
2. For a four day workweek.
I kinda wish Dolly sang 10-3 instead
— stoned cold fox (@roastmalone_) January 20, 2022
3. We’ll take a slice of the red velvet bread.
I guess “banana bread” does sound healthier than “breakfast cake.”
— Akilah Green (@akilahgreen) January 20, 2022
4. Not yet…
5. Flurries expected in Los Angeles tomorrow.
Autocorrect is wrong so often that I’m going to start calling it meteorologist
— Anna (@AnnaDoesntWant2) January 20, 2022
6. Trust fund kids! They’re just like us!
https://twitter.com/tonyposnanski/status/1484139384559575044
7. Jeez, give them some privacy.
8. Exclamation points are next.
I've started putting periods at the end of my sentences again like an Amish person.
— Sandra Newman (@sannewman) January 17, 2022
9. The protein bars are right there. Don’t tempt us.
yo why does fruit and veg expire so quickly like give me a chance babe im trying
— tripp (@mrshvrif) January 14, 2022
10. Rude.
Spent all morning on the verge of canceling a meeting and they just canceled on me so now I’m furious.
— logan bartlett (@loganbartlett) January 13, 2022
11. Dunno…sounds sus.
wordle people can y’all take a break so we can all get back into among us again i missed that
— i can be your long lost pal (@PallaviGunalan) January 13, 2022
12. Nothing says being woke like ditching your heels.
Losing the voting rights bill and getting woke M&Ms instead feels about right
— Laura Bassett (@LEBassett) January 20, 2022
13. Us: thanks for the reminder to order white go-go boots.
https://twitter.com/titonka/status/1484260401328054273
14. Was it the silly straw?
https://twitter.com/hansdickie/status/1484026828201381889
15. You heard the raccoon.
Why stop at onion rings? I want an onion necklace. We have the technology
— Son of Dad (@Thuggedraccoon) January 17, 2022
16. Who doesn’t get one? And don’t everyone say Pauly D at once.
https://twitter.com/JerseyShore/status/1484259932597886979
17. Laundry done. Ga-ling! Dishes washed. Ga-ling! Yeah, ok, she’s right.
if i heard the mario coin sound whenever i completed a task maybe i’d accomplish more
— Tiff (@its_me_your_mom) January 19, 2022
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