Another week, more funny tweets by women. You know the drill, right? This week we watched the Bachelorette for the first time (do not recommend sorry not sorry), but the premiere episode did result in some pretty silly memes. We also discovered that Costco is selling those hot chocolate bombs and that we need to make some peanut butter chocolate ones.
Oh, and heads up, Mercury is in retrograde.
Want more hilarious tweets? See our past roundups, check out our Jokes, or just follow us on Twitter at @letseatcakeblog.
25 Funny Tweets by Women
1. We love lamp.
2. Both are very good doggos.
For my astrophysics friends pic.twitter.com/aTb7cVKxJm
— New Year, New Jasmine ????????2️⃣0️⃣2️⃣1️⃣ (@astro_jaz) October 16, 2020
3. Well, at least there was a promising start?
how it started: how it’s going: pic.twitter.com/Q7yHnZWYgg
— Kat Maddox (@ctrlshifti) October 11, 2020
4. We really can’t take the Elder Ones anywhere. Here’s more funny tweets from @RoxiQT
We need to take better care of the ocean because terrifying things live down there & if we destroy their home, they are going to come into ours. If you think traffic is bad now, wait until Cthulhu is sitting in the middle of the highway trying to eat a school bus.
— Roxi Horror ???????? (@roxiqt) October 9, 2020
5. Pucker up!
she want kith pic.twitter.com/JG7lCM1vcr
— bibi ʚ♡ɞ (@uwubiibi) October 12, 2020
6. We’re going for bronze at best.
me after not drinking 2 nights in a row pic.twitter.com/bXmA2z2FL7
— Catherine Cohen (@catcohen) October 14, 2020
7. They weren’t wrong.
fun fact: Vikings made their woman handle the finances because they thought math was witchcraft
— HIBA (@iatemuggles) October 10, 2020
8. Time to find a new shrink again.
my therapist: you’re a good person
me: oh no I’ve tricked you too
— Ely Kreimendahl (@ElyKreimendahl) October 13, 2020
9. Posh Spice is just another name for herbes de Provence
the spice girls should have had names like Turmeric. baby isn’t even a spice
— rax ‘jew’ king (@RaxKingIsDead) October 12, 2020
10. We’re here to help!
— HIBA (@iatemuggles) August 31, 2020
11. Where else do you think Jaws came from?
People always throwing cursed objects into the sea hello, no that is how you get haunted sharks
— jess a four seasons brambles company ⚪️ (@jessokfine) August 9, 2017
12. Don’t even get us started on croissants.
culinary students be like i got a spaghetti due at 11:50
— ????♀️ (@Stbubs) October 17, 2020
13. Is it over yet?
I am not a good hugger. Tonight a friend hugged me and I dropped some crackers I was holding and just gently said “my crackers” while waiting for the hug to end
— Ally (@TragicAllyHere) January 27, 2019
14. Yes but we’re still replying “stop.”
I get why we shouldn’t but I still wish we could start text-banking convos with “u up?” so that more people reply
— Karen Chee (@karencheee) October 17, 2020
15. You can’t make us.
“check your email” no, that’s where the emails live
— Rachel (@femaleredhead) October 15, 2020
16. Maybe it’s time we finally focused on ourselves.
"been chasing people in their dreams so long i forgot to chase my own" pic.twitter.com/ljbNbFMHOR
— sad & ugly ☹ (@SadSpookySeason) October 16, 2020
17. The kombucha is never going to recover from this.
Me: *makes a left at the light*
My groceries in back:
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???? ???? ????
???? ???????? ???? ????
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???? ????— ????steph???? (@eff_yeah_steph) October 14, 2020
18. Wilted bag of spinach, we see you. We’re still not going to eat you. But we see you.
The average age of items in my fridge https://t.co/SSfg2USGTi
— The Betches Sup (@Betches_Sup) October 14, 2020
19. Oat-milk-ception
Putting oat milk in my oatmeal pic.twitter.com/htMD7PLnmX
— Small Crimes (@JasMoneyRecords) October 13, 2020
20. Ta-da!
me after not drinking 2 nights in a row pic.twitter.com/bXmA2z2FL7
— Catherine Cohen (@catcohen) October 14, 2020
21. It was?
Remember when "where do you see yourself in 5 years" was a logical question?
— Hanna Dickinson (@hansdickie) October 19, 2020
22. Fine, just iced coffee from now on.
my plants my internal organs
????
behaving terribly no matter how much water i give them— monicaheisey (@monicaheisey) October 11, 2020
23. Oooh and then she said what?
I miss eavesdropping.
— Jenni Konner (@JenniKonner) October 16, 2020
24. There were other options?
Am I the only one who makes this face while putting on mascara? pic.twitter.com/akPwzOM0Gw
— Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling) October 16, 2020
25. Today we got Jacob. That actually isn’t a joke. (He’s very nice.)
spelling bee judge: your word is "steve"
starbucks barista: oh no
— Abbie (@AbbieEvansXO) October 14, 2020
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